Thursday, December 2, 2010

Heartbreaking

Tryn and I had an a heartbreaking conversation the other day. Well, rough for her at least. We were driving home after I picked the girls up from childcare and Tryn was telling me how part of her green mankie had fallen off that day. If anyone remembers my post from back in March you might remember how I wrote about one of Tryn's blankets falling apart. These poor blankets are becoming so thin and worn.

Anyway, I said to Tryn, "Those mankies are getting kind of old. Pretty soon we will have to put them away."

I didn't realize that she was in such a sensitive mood at the time, because she started sobbing like her heart was breaking, "Mom, wh-wh-WHY?! Why are they getting too old? I want to sleep with my mankies!"

I tried a little bit of logic, "Well, Babe, when people get bigger they don't sleep with mankies or animals anymore. Mommy doesn't sleep with any mankies, just pillows and my bed blankets to keep me warm."

"Not with animals?!!" Like it was the only part she heard. "Is Sophie going to get too old too?" Mind you, all this is said while she is still sobbing. "I need Sophie. And Sophie needs me. She needs to sleep with me!"

I tried explaining a little more, "Sweetie, don't cry. We won't throw them away ever, okay? Someday we will just start leaving them just on your bed and then maybe someday we will put them in a special box that you can keep for as long as you want."

"Nooooo! No! I need my mankies and my Sophie!"

"Okay, Babe, it won't be for awhile, okay? Maybe when you are like 6 or 7, okay?"

Just crying.

Ugh.

This is one of the times when I realized I messed up as a parent. I did either one of two things wrong here. I either let her get way too attached to some pieces of material and a stuffed dog (I mean, these things literally go everywhere with her. I can't even tell you the number of times Sophie has been to Target. The other day green mankie went to Target tied around Tryn's shoulders like a cape.) OR I brought this up way too soon and should have waiting until she was 6 or 7 to approach the subject. I don't actually know which one is the right, or was the wrong, decision here. Probably should have started phasing them out when she was younger.

Either way, this part of Tryn's future is going to be heartbreaking.


This is a picture of Tryn laying on her green mankie in Poland when she was 5 weeks old. Like I said, these manks have been everywhere.

3 comments:

Laura said...

With teeth like that you have to have a mankie! :)

Melissa said...

I have a feeling I will be dealing with the same thing with Jackson and his 'ellee'. And he is a boy...definitely not as acceptable as for a girl :)

Mamma Bird said...

Both my boys had a blanket they loved. I did not let them take it places though; their blanket had to stay on the bed. When they were four I put it in a clear box (so they could see it) in the closet on a high shelf and it could only come out if it was a big reason, sick or lost pet or something. I think it will be fine, you just do not want them NEEDING ONLY it. Spread out the self soothing on other things. Pillow, music, fan, or what ever other self soothing techniques they might like. EVERYONE has SST they just don't always know it. Dark, Pillow, Quite, Fan and Husband are mine.