Saturday, January 31, 2009
I sold my violin today. Yes, once upon a time there was this little girl named Heidi who played the violin. I have owned a violin almost as long as I can remember. In fact, I think a violin is the one thing that I have consistently owned since the age of 8 or 9, I have never been without one. I bought this violin with my own hard earned money the year I graduated from high school because I fell in love with it. As I stood in a bathroom at MacPahail, while a 14 year old punk girl in a hoodie, flannel pajama pants, and chucks, who had taken lessons for the last 11 years, played my violin, I realized my violin was really being played for the first time ever. She was amazing. I could have stood there and listened to her play for hours. I have never been even close to as good as she is, never. I gave her the instrument, took the money, got in my car, and cried. I cried all the way home.
I don't even really know why, except now I know for sure that I will never play the violin as well as I always dreamed and wanted to. I guess I gave up on a dream today.
The good news? Now I am finally going to get a nice camera! I told Steve that I refused to sell my violin for anything except a camera. I almost changed my mind this morning as Steve got out his guitar and we played together...I played my violin for the last time. But, I am really excited about a camera.